Sometimes when you are in a thought process that becomes a habit, it's hard to get out of it. It may be from things that happened in your life, it may be from people in your life telling you these things that perpetuate the thought process. It could be good, it could be bad things. What I am referring to are the negative things we accept. That thought process becomes our habit until we believe what we have been told. We accept it as truth when it is not true at all.
A person begins to believe they deserve nothing because they are nothing, not worth anything. When somebody comes along and they see something in you that you have never seen it is hard to believe because that negative thought process has become so deeply ingrained into your soul it negates the positive.
It is like being in a prison and you struggle against the bars trying to get free but it is hard. You want to be free but somehow you don't know how to do it. But there's a realization in your heart that you don't want to live in that anymore. Sometimes it's a day by day struggle, sometimes it's a moment by moment struggle.
It's scary when somebody sees something good in you because deep down inside you don't feel like there is anything good about you and the moment they realize that the jig is up. You know somehow you're going to mess it all up because they're the good one and you're the bad one and you don't deserve anything good. It's a hard place to be in when you can't find the exit door.
But then you see a glimpse of light, you see other people who live and talk different, it's like a foreign language you want to speak, there's a little inkling of hope inside your soul that you can learn that language.
I've seen enough of wrong
To know I want right
I've lived in the dark long enough
I want the light.
I've had enough of lies
I want the truth
I've had enough of words that cut
I need words that soothe.
